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New Freaker: Jail Bait!


Goldfish, man.

When was the last time you saw a goldfish that wasn't in a zip-lock bag at the state fair? Or being objectified as a cracker in the snack aisle? Or swimming in a tiny circle around its prison of a canning jar over and over and over again while it's cries for help fall on deaf ears because nobody has taken the time to learn the intricate indigenous language.

In the ocean, the age of “I’m gonna eat you” consent is just past caviar. Goldfish have it tough, and we’re here to help. For every Freaker you buy this week, we’ll chant Si Swim Puerde three times. For freedom.

Ladies & Gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to the newest member of the Freaker Family... Jail Bait!

September 02, 2014 by Freaker USA
Tags: Freakers

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