Welcome to the Freaker mill,
We hope you find it quite a thrill!
I would like to introduce you to good man Brad Land
Who will now explain the magic yard marching brand!
"Once you crawl from beneath the giant yarn rolls you will get attacked by an air hose and lose your hardhart, and all the while, there will be whistling, you will be confused, your hair will be rearranged and so will your beard. Do not fret! Do not despair! Pick up your hard hat! Place it squarely atop your head. Look around! Everyone is whisling, just for you! Everyone is smiling. They are glad, so glad, that you are here!."
–Brad Land, author