Where were you the first time you saw that perplexing Brad Pitt commercial? Did it penetrate your life bubble? Did it frolic it's way into your heart? Did it put your emotions in a microwave oven? Yes. I know. We understand you.

That's why we're here to guide you. Just like Brad Pitt guided us on our journey. Wait. No. It's not a journey. DAMNIT.

For those of you that are confused, we have a present for you. For clarification purposes: this Chanel ad was not intended as a joke. This is real life. Because evidently we're living in the Maudlin Matrix. Stay classy, cyberweb.