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Whenever something (anything!) happens, people drown each other in the word "Congratulations." After a certain point, it looses it's meaning and the word morphs into a cold robotic auto-response. It's high-time for a rebranding of the limp Congratulations. Let's try:
Your best friend has a little bun plundering their oven? Is marrying a powerhouse wildcard? Just graduated warlord school? Won the emperor election? Finally invaded Eurasia? That's wonderful! GENGHIS KHANGRATULATIONS!
See? Perfect for all occasions! Say it like you mean it. Say it with ferocity. Say it with the might of a million Mongolian warriors. And also a Freaker.
Ladies and gentlemen, give a warm welcome to the newest member of the Freaker Family... Khangratulations!