Blog!

Why does this email look like it's about to drop the hottest mixtape of 2016? Because we just slammed out 74 new Freakers + Freaker Feet for your feel-good-hit-of-the-summer! We have a little treat for all the moods: Action thriller smackdown? Jean Claude Van Ham & Van Diesel! A love song for the ages? Hall & Goats! Scientific discovery journey? Orbit Please, Dirt Nap, & Atlas Chugged! One for the kiddos? Turn Down for Tut & Tortoise & The Hair! Beach read easy rider? Tropickle! We have 14 new boutique Freakers, 12 boutique Freaker Feet, 30 new NFL Player Freakers, and 18 NFL Player socks, waiting for the plunder. Your time is now, young grasshopper. Shop our new-new here!

Time Warner Cable's "Made in the Carolinas" segment did a feature on yours truly. Take a peek into the world of Freakerville here!!

Conspiracy theories can be absurdist, suspicious, bizarre, or ...ahem... illuminating. Favorites include: The moon does not exist. World governments are run by alien lizards in human costumes. Israel uses remote-controlled sharks as spies. Denver Airport is literally hell. Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer. Katy Perry is Jonbenet Ramsey. Barbara Bush is Marilyn Monroe. Of course Illuminati ramblings are always lurking in the shadows... but WHAT IF PIZZA RULED THE WORLD? We'll sign on to that world-view anyday. This week only, Zalluminati socks are 30% off!

Twenty years ago, Will Smith celebrated Independence Day by laying the smackdown on a hoard of alien invaders. Now let's reimagine the story as a happier one, where all players involved take a healthy dosage of Chill Pills. Fast forward to present day: we're all lounging on the beach with our extraterrestrial besties, smoking cigars and laughing at the old times of prank abductions. *ayy lmao* We come in peace, y'all. This week only, Alien Gonzalez Freakers & Freaker Feet are 30% off!

Step 1: Aquire mullet. Step 2: Perm mullet. Step 3: Bask in glory. Rinse, and repeat.  

There's no better way to rev up your July 4th pregame, than some constitutional debauchery. We're here to help. Every. Single. Order. will receive a free Yankee Panky! For freedom! While supplies last.

Co-founder and Director Of Some Things, Lauren, shares the Freaker philosophy of facepalms and chuckle parades. "We're all just little blib-blurps on a beautiful planet, and it's our civic duty to have, and spread, the giggles." Thanks, Thrillist!!!! We like our jobs too. 

Today we're celebrating the ingenuity of unexpected objects. Fancypants international spies get the most credit for wacko gadgets, with their pencils that double as rifles, and pet ferrets with micro-chipped webcams. But what's stopping the rest of us from joining in on the fun? Ladies and gentlemen, it is with extreme and wonky honor that we introduce you to the James Bond of plantlife. Ready? GO: WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: We have 5 care packages this week featuring the king of unorthodox planters, Wyatt Little! Wyatt Little is a Texas-based designer that makes clever homegoods with mass appeal. His ceramics specialize in seemingly everyday objects with a twist - mixing humor, talent, and utility to create the perfect-storm of radness. From Zac Morris cell phones to dapper baby tennis shoes, knight your green friends with perpetual stylepoints. Each winner gets a planter from Wyatt Little and a Blue Jay Z Freaker! HOW TO ENTER: Get on Instagram and show us an unexpected object with the hashtag #FreakerLittle for your chance to win! Winners announced in our Tuesday newsletter!

By the powers invested in Freaker USA, we hereby pronounce June 24th as the official Bring Your Baby Goat To Work Day. We also encourage the rights of all to exercise this holiday-of-splendor often. Everyday. For as long as we all shall live. Amen.

Hey little bird,  You’re looking mighty fly today. On a new diet? Magna carta holy grain or 99 pellets? For someone who always seems to be in the beak of your career, you sure can get, that, dirt off your scapulars.  I'll let you fly home and nest with Beyonce, but know that we're popping bottles for you. It's a champange super hova.  This week only, Blue Jay Z is 30% off!

No feud here! Steve Harvey is officially aboard the Freakertrain!

Could it be?!? American Ninja Warrior in our Babe Lincoln Freaker Feet!It's a proud day in Freakerville.