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Special treats can make or break any day. Unexpectedly fired? Have a locally-sourced popsicle! Wife left you? Eat a repurposed pickle! It's Monday? Secret Mimosas! (Only use organic orange juice hand-squeezed with organic hands, of course.) The best part about special treats is that they're completely different depending on where you are. If you order "special treat" in Maryland, you might get a pet crab, whereas Chino might give you a knuckle sandwich. We, however, we'll give you a grilled cheese and a Freaker Friday. WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: We have 5 care packages this week featuring foodie treats curated by NC Made! NC Made is a small team of taste-testing enthusiasts that run a gourmet gift-box operation for specialty foods handcrafted in North Carolina! They travel the state tasting the handcrafted specialties of each region, then curating the best of the best into gift boxes for the world to drool over... AKA your new dream job. Each winner will get to choose from blister-fried peanuts (an eastern NC recipe!) or pickles from "an award-winning producer in western NC transforming their local bounty into the best pickles you'll ever eat." They also gets a Cackalacky Freaker! HOW TO ENTER: Get on Instagram & show us your special sauce (interpret that however you'd like!) with the hashtag #freakermade for your chance to win! Winners announced in our Tuesday newsletter!

We all have a fairweather fan friend. They scream at all the wrong moments, root for the team that’s making the most “goals” and booooooooo die-die-die whatever team had the most recent scandal on TMZ. And that’s fine. Fairweather fans are people too. Just because they can’t settle down with one team doesn’t mean you can’t invite them to your football parties! I mean... They usually bring nachos. And nachos are important.  From now until Sunday night, for every 5 Jock Itch (go team!) you buy, we’re throwing in a free Laces Out (unaffiliated football!) for your fair-weather fan friend, so they can play along with whichever team they like that day! Because this is 2014 and they have football-party rights too, dammit. (Note: Each Laces Out will be added in manually! Even though they be on your order confirmation, they will absolutely be in your care package!)

Our friends at Next Glass, another Wilmington-based company revolutionizing the way you drink things, recently did an interview with our co-founder Lauren about jerk bosses, Danzig, and some mysterious projects that we have in the works.  They had this bit which has made us blush uncontrollably for three days now: "Freaker is a fist in the air when the band is bombing. It’s the high five followed by a low 10, no questions asked. It’s a reminder to live your life in color, no matter what. You’ll be hard pressed to find a company that fulfills the values they promote so entirely-don’t just use a Freaker, live the Freaker-and for that, Next Glass is proud to share the Wilmington area with Freaker USA." Thanks, dingdongs! We're honored to take on this "DRINK THINGS BETTER, brought to you with love from Wilmington" mission with you too! IMPORTANT SIDE NOTE: They also have an incredibly cute cat: 

Tiny Dancer meets his match. Hold me closer, Tony Danza! 

  Once upon a time Petey Pablo put North Carolina on the pop culture map by telling everybody to take off their shirts, because "North Carolina." Instead of questioning that logic, the masses did exactly what he told them to. Because North Carolina. But North Carolina is more than just shirtless helicopter parties in a parking lot. North Carolina is where where people fight over the definition of "BBQ," where the sweetest tea, the sweetest treats, Blackbeard, moonshine, biscuits, BISCUITS, (speaking of biscuits, Fred Durst is from NC), Bat Cave, Wagon Wheel, first in flight (calm down, Ohio, this isn't about you), weirdly divisive shades of blue, venus fly traps, Merge Records and hurricane parties happen. North Carolina is where Freakers happen. I mean come on. We made Michael Jordan AND Cheerwine, y'all. Raise up. Ladies & Gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to the newest member of the Freaker Family... Cackalacky!!

Notice anything familiar creepin' on Chris Rock and Rosario Dawson?!  That's our little she-creep of a co-founder, Lauren, dressed like a manic housewife and advertising a Freaker that's been dead for two years! Anybody remember Kuptakes? We do! We also remember giving this particular photo to a film-friend because she looks especially special. Let's have a closer look: There's the money shot! (Thanks, Chad Keith! You're the Chad to our Keith!)

Ever since we released Jail Bait earlier this week, we've been feeling a little guilty for incarcerating an innocent fish inside of a mason jar just for the funsies. How cruel! How unusual! We've since tried to free her, but alas, the deed has been done. Who will save the fish-damsel trapped in a jar? Dragonslayer is currently on tour with his new Meat Loaf tribute band. Spiderman has developed a crippling fear of both jars AND water. And Batman is Ben Affleck. This is a job for good ol' American muscle. We need your help. Even if you don't know how to turn on a hammer, it's impossible not to feel like a badass when you're using products made from sweat and steel. Let's git r' dun and save that fish, team. WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: We have 5 care packages this week featuring Machine Era Co! The guys over at Machine Era are designers, craftsmen, metal fabricators, innovators, and above all, masters in the art of badassery. Good design and every-day functionality had a saucy love affair, then out popped Machine Era's keysquare. Crafted in their workshop in Richmond, VA, the keysquares are designed to securely attach to your belt loop, open bottles, and be used and abused for an absurd amount of time. They are, after all, cut and machined from a piece of solid effin steel. Each winner also gets a Jail Bait Freaker! HOW TO ENTER: Collectively, we need to build up the courage to save this fish-damsel in distress from it's jar incarceration. Get on Facebook, find this graphic, and leave a photo comment showing us something that automatically makes you feel more badass by just looking at it. Winners announced in our Tuesday newsletter!

Goldfish, man. When was the last time you saw a goldfish that wasn't in a zip-lock bag at the state fair? Or being objectified as a cracker in the snack aisle? Or swimming in a tiny circle around its prison of a canning jar over and over and over again while it's cries for help fall on deaf ears because nobody has taken the time to learn the intricate indigenous language. In the ocean, the age of “I’m gonna eat you” consent is just past caviar. Goldfish have it tough, and we’re here to help. For every Freaker you buy this week, we’ll chant Si Swim Puerde three times. For freedom. Ladies & Gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to the newest member of the Freaker Family... Jail Bait!

Famous duos are great. Peanut butter & jelly? Idiom for a reason. Hall would be nowhere without Oates. Selfies & duckface? A holy union. Tia & Tamara. Dumb & Dumber. Chip & Dale. Such finesse. Such harmony. Such teamwork. But for every famous duo, there are twenty underrated teams of two. Vans & candy. K-Ci & JoJo. The Glove & Reign Man. Prodigy & Havoc. Dogs & donuts. DOGS. AND. DONUTS. I mean, come onnnnnnn. Move aside, Batman & Robin - there's a new two in town. WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: We have 12 care packages this week featuring Vinca USA! The lovely ladies at Vinca are quirk royalty in the capital of quirk, Austin, Texas, where they run a "micro manufacturing" operation for their eccentric jewelry. Lions & tigers & bears? It's been done. How about dinosaurs & pickles & mermaids & astronauts & hedgehogs & narwhals & tacos & dogs... and yes, donuts. Game on. Each winner gets their choice of donut, doggie, or green leaf (hint: Glaucoma!) earrings and a Mister Pete Freaker! HOW TO ENTER: Let us know on Twitter who/what you think is the most underrated duo with the hashtag #VincaDuo for your chance to win! Winners announced in our Tuesday newsletter!

Everybody has heroes. A select few are lucky enough to someday meet their heroes. A select few of those select few get to know their heroes. Then there are the select few of the select few of the select few that legally own their heroes. Hopefully, I'm the only one. Mister Pete is the pinnacle of puppy perfection. He is the hall monitor, the hot cop, the one who fearlessly says "Donut Do That." He is briefed on all executive decisions before they're put into action. This company was built on the sweat, fur and wonk of Mister Pete's side eyes. Today is National Dog Day. Everything we do, we do it for you, Mister Pete. Ladies & Gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to the newest member of the Freaker Family... Mister Pete!

The babes are back in town! Restocked and ready to freak, give a warm welcome-back to Main St, Lumbersmack and Forget Me Now!

None of us here in Freakerville have children, but everytime we borrow one (you know, like ya do.) we're always floored by the creativity of little ones. No, kid, it's not a spaceship, it's a freezer. Yes, you can be an ice cream sandwich when you grow up. Sure, play with this french fry for six hours - see if I care. It's Friday afternoon. We're all officially 6 years old until Monday. Game on? Game on. WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: We have 5 care packages this week featuring the back to school brilliance of Public - Supply notebooks! It was the crisp design of Public - Supply that pulled us in, but it's the young Brooklynite company's concept that pushed us over the "holy moly, you're awesome" edge. For each product sold, they donate a percentage of profits to creative projects in public school classrooms via DonorsChoose.org. The transparency of their process is particularly remarkable: "We stamp a tracking number on every product we ship, so when you receive your purchase in the mail, you can visit our Classrooms page and match your tracking number with the classroom and project that you helped fund. We'll also keep a list there of classrooms we've helped in the past, and post any correspondence from teachers we've stayed in touch with." Each care package comes with a Public - Supply notebook, pencil, and a Tooth Fairy Freaker! HOW TO ENTER: Get on Instagram and show us your silliest childhood snapshot with the hashtag #freakersupply for your chance to win! Winners announced in our Tuesday newsletter!