Blog!

Look at that mess. That is our office. How did it get to be such a mess? Ah, let's break it down.

It's election day, which means that everybody is excitable about at least 1 government agency. Well. We found ours to pick on. We are in a bloody battle with the US Post Office. As far as we know so far, they have lost at least 11 packages in the past month, most of which were shipped on October 21st. We ship all packages within 24 hours of it's order! If you haven't received your LoveBox and it's been a little bit... please email us to let us know and we'll take care of you. With TLC. Like the girlband. (There are absolutely No Scrubs in our warehouse. BOOM.)

This is Lauren Krakauskas. She sat in an empty bathtub until 6 am on Friday night writing emails and screaming absurdities. Welcome to the circus, little doves. We here at The Freakerteam have been channeling busy/buzzing/bubbling bumblebees lately. Here is a comprehensive list of some of the things that we have accomplished. (Photos to prove that all of the rumors are true.)

Dear Diary, As you know, Saturdays are usually pretty sad for me. Often times I sit looking out my window, longing for the aqua and orange walls of the Freaker USA headquarters. The rest of my weekend usually drags on until I wake up with a smile Monday morning and drive to work… This weekend was different! In light of recent events. I got to hang out with my Freaker friends all day! This is the story of eight best friends, and the most perfect day there ever was. First, we all got to sit around and watch replays of a certain show on ABC.

Everybody has subconscious habits. Whether it be biting your nails, accidentally collecting spoons, or evoking the spirit of Peewee Herman in any and all conversations, it is part of the human condition to have subliminal patterns. We have just come to terms with one of our subconscious habits. If it is a "good thing" or a "bad thing" has yet to be determined, but at least we now acknowledge the fact .... that we really love referencing tasteless pop songs in love notes. Chronically.

Look at that scowl. That nurturing, tender scowl. It's National Hug-Your-Office-Mom Day!!!  Celebrations COMMENCE! 

When we have an "Art-On-The-Wall Budget," expect this to be hovering over every single desk.  The Problem With Pandas.  (by Melissa Gable)

  You learn something new every day. Yesterday, we learned "ALWAYS BE A BALLER." Following this new philosophy, we immediately ordered so many boxes that the box company sent us a free camoflauge children's tent. Lauren doesn't do well in "the outdoors," but she pretends to be a survivalist, so we gave her the fort as a new office space in the backroom. 

  Every now and then, we have a pow-wow happy-dance and screen print 500 boxes. Today is one of those days.  

  Have you ever heard a middle-class college student complain that their day has been ruined because the new iPhone won't be released for another month? That, my dear, is commonly referred to as "white girl problems." (Evidently white men don't have problems? Common nomenclature can be politically incorrect. Rude.) This morning, the Freaker Office had our own version of "White Girl Problems":

Yes. That IS a sad puppy-head in a cone-bubble. I'm sorry.

Lauren does not have narcolepsy. She does, however, fall asleep mid-sentence at the office sometimes. This is usually after a night of being a responsible-adult (hear that, kids?)