Blog!

Photos from the "Help-Freaker-Get-Their-Shit-Back" Concert have touched homebase! Are you a little twitchy after this whole national NSA conversation? Are you feeling a little left out because your online presence isn't incriminating enough to spy on? WELL FEAR NO MORE, LITTLE CHICKIES! You're in the club! (I'm just kidding. They're not that bad. Actually, they're all very pleasant and beautiful! Thanks Saben Kane!)

We have important news, so we'll put it in bullet points, to signify its importance: - Our team mascot, Mister Pete, has been afflicted with a hotspot on his butt. - Like any loving family would do, we made him into a donut. - There is a secret mini-line of 8 new Freakers - You can have them, for free, by helping us laugh at Pete, who is now a donut! That's right, folks! We're hosting another Facebook giveaway contest!! Pete's donut has given him a new sense of confidence, and his bossiness is getting out of control. Submit a photo (tweet it at us, instagram us, post it to our Facebook wall, email it, whatever!) of what you think Pete is yelling at. We'll use computer-magic to make it into a DONUT meme and put it in our special Facebook album. Whoever photo gets the most "likes" wins all 8 new secret Freakers!!! DONUT disturb, DONUT enter, DONUT start forest fires, and please, whatever you do… DONUT do that. Winner(s?) announced in 2 weeks! Go team-meme!

Let's role play. Not in the dirty-way, but in the dirty-rap-way. Imagine that you are in a rap group called Jelly Jam Cake. Your fans don't only want the freshest tunes, they want the most delicious. To make make it in this game, your cake-mix will knead to rise to the occasion(Baking pun for the win!). WHAT YOU'RE WINNING THIS WEEK: We have 3 pairs of Jamboo headphones! Jamboo is a California based company that, much like us, recently got their launch on Kickstarter! The cords are threaded with yarns so your headphones won't tangle and the earbuds are made of bamboo, so you can pretend to be a panda. A rapper panda. Each winner gets a Vanilla Ice-ing Freaker too! (Total Retail Value: $40) HOW TO ENTER: Go to Vanilla Ice-Ing's product page and let us know in the comment section what sort of artistic musings we'll be able to find on the upcoming album from your fake rap-group "Jelly Jam Cake!" Title tracks, lyrics, album name, liner notes, anything goes!

Hey! You! Remember that time you were conceived? Me too. Of course your mother played "kangaroo" with you for a couple months, and she's made sure that you'll never forget that fact - but there was another party involved in the whole "making you" process. This Sunday, it's your duty to thank your dad for that. Is there a better way to say "thank you for freaking, Dad" than freaking your Dad? We thinks not. Daddy Day Freaker Sale! From now until the 16th, save $2 on select styles for the pops!

All event photos are by Justin Mitchener except for this one which was the result of "Lauren creepin' with an iPhone." Yesterday, Wilmington celebrated one of it's special traditions: Taking your family to a park & getting sloshed while dancing around to an eccentric man with a microphone and a mustache. Donavon Frankenreiter strikes again! This time, the concert was held at Battleship Park - yes! there is a real battleship there! BAM BAM BAM! - and the Freaker Boxtruck decided to show facial-hair-solidarity! Let's all relive 12-hours ago with photos from Justin Mitchener and his brand-new camera! (Yeeeeeeee, speaking of, photos of the robbery-benefit concert will be here soon! Thank you again! You're the best! The whole lot of yews!)

Forever, by definition, is a very long time. People like to market "diamonds" as being "forever," but I don't buy it. Diamonds can be misplaced just as easily as your house keys. You know what's harder to lose? YOUR LIMBS. So, by scientific process, tattoos are the new diamonds. And fake tattoos are your new house keys. Let's celebrate this fact. WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: This week there are 5 care packages, each with 8 Tattlys and a Freaker of your choice!!! Made in the USA, designed by a variety of professional artists (who get a cut of every sale!), and printed with soy based ink, Tattly is the design-child of SwissMiss and Studiomates! And they are wonderful. (Total retail value: $25!) HOW TO ENTER: Show us your body-artistry on Instagram!!! They can be real tattoos, they can be drawn on with a magic marker, or they can be duct taped your torso. It doesn't matter. Just let us see those skin decorations with the hashtag #TattlyTail for your chance to win!!!

There comes a time in every man's (or woman's! We are aware of sexual harassment equality, yes we are!) life when you have to plagiarize yourself. This is one of those times.   Prepare the Delorean, Alfred:

Last year, you gave your Dad a tie for Father's Day. He spent the rest of the night in the garage with a bottle of Jack Daniels drawing up blueprints for a hand-carved canoe. Haven't you already disappointed your Father enough? You still may not know the difference between regular fuel and diesel, but at least you can get your Dad something he will use this year! To thank the Big Papas of the world, Heeltar, Lil' Ben, Draper, and Yonderdown are $2 off from today through the 16th!

Well-a well-a wella, huh, tell me more, tell me more! Remember when you were just a wee little kid and summer was fast approaching. Anything was possible, even the unlikely union of Sandy and Danny! There were so many things to be excited about! Sunshine! Friends! Ice cream! Splash parties! FORTS! Well in the wise words of Journey, "Don't Stop Believing," you goon! This past week has been filled with so much love and excitement … not a lot of ice cream though… that we want to give everybody summer presents! Smell the sun, little chickies! WHAT YOU'RE WINNING: Since we want to spread the love far and wide this week, we are going to select 15 WINNERS! Each care package will contain a Freaker-themed handmade Pulsera Project bracelet and a Fresh Prints Freaker! The Pulsera Project is a non-profit organization that educates, empowers, and connects Nicaraguan youth with students in the United States who provide a market for their handmade crafts. HOW TO ENTER: As things get hotter and more humid, the ability to stay So Fresh and So Clean takes more and more work! Tell us how you plan to beat the heat and stay stylin' and profilin' this summer! You can enter 2 ways! Tweet your answer with the hashtag #FreakerFresh OR comment your answer on Fresh Prints' product page here!!!! OKAY LOVE YOU BYE!

Once upon a time, Freakerteam-member Lauren drank too much wine and got all monster-face-y with the Mayor of Wilmington. Photographer Saben Kane Matthews was there to capture her inglorious (??) moment. TONIGHT, you will all have ample opportunities for your very own inglorious moments and Saben Kane will be there to capture them too!!!! Get fancy, get snapped. (OH SNAP!) Saben Kane coming in for the win! Soapbox. 8pm. Grilled cheese and glory bands!

Some of us here at Freaker USA have fallen into a wormhole called Game of Thrones.  In the HBO series, there are kingdoms and knighthoods and dragons ... and castles! We're also big fans of make-believe worlds in real life, meaning that we've been wielding imaginary swords to hypothetical bad guys. If you don't have weekend plans, you might want to step inside of our little world for a moment... Our office is on Castle Street (no, really. It's actually called Castle Street), and it is populated with bannermen to the Kingdom of Wilmington! The Castle Street sigil is a Penguin, and it just happens to be that Penguin's 10th birthday this Saturday so there will be an all-day tournament of excitement in celebration! The Freaker boxtruck will be there in full form, but unfortunately we will not be hosting jousting ... this time.

There is no shortage of celebratory holidays, some nationally recognized, most not. Social media keeps us forever reminded of the important memorials like International Talk-Like-A-Pirate-Day (Sept 19th) and Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day (Jan 26th). The sheer number of bizarre holidays is intimidating ... and that is exactly our excuse for making up a new holiday rather than fact-checking to see if it already exists! Hooray!  On that note, we are pleased to announce the commencement of a new day for celebration: National Hug-A-Hero Day!